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Answer every question honestly. It is better to get the facts before you
confront the suspected cheater, because if they know you are suspicious, they
will become even more secretive. This will only cause them to clean up their act
and make it more difficult for you to catch them. These question DO NOT tell you
if your spouse is cheating for certain, but rather a general guide toward
understanding cheating. If you believe for certain your spouse is cheating seek
professional help.
 ATTENTION:
Recently has your spouse become much more attentive to you, or be very critical
of small faults you may or may not have?
At the beginning of an affair the mate that is cheating is more attentive to his
spouse. This is due to guilt that the cheater may be feeling at the time. After
the affair has been going on for a while the person cheating seems to find fault
with the person he/she may be living with to try to justify the affair in their
mind. The cheater has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the
home, especially the mate (i.e. if he/she didn't act the way they do, well then
maybe I wouldn't be doing the things I do).
COMMUNICATION: Does your spouse or partner get
strange phone calls? Do they use their cell phone a lot in private? Do they hide
windows and have a lot of private online time? Up until most recently
cell phones, were the most common way for cheaters to communicate, however,
today, e-mail and online chat are now even more common. Still, many cheaters use
cellular telephones to communicate with their lovers. Should your mate have a
cellular telephone you may want to get a detailed billing of the calls made from
the cellular phone to determine whether a certain number has been frequently
called. A good area to start looking is for the first number called when your
mate first leaves for work and the same number called again right before they
return home. Be tuned in to home telephone calls when your mate has a tendency
to whisper or gives a quick answer and immediately hangs up or when you answer
the telephone and get an abrupt hang up.
SEXUALITY: Does your spouse have a sexier aura
lately? Do they have a dramatically higher or lower sex drive? Do they groom
more often, buy new clothes, dress more sexy at work? Cheaters grooming
habits will change. Cheaters will be more attentive to their person (i.e.. the
way they dress, frequent bathing, physical fitness, grooming of their hair,
switching of colognes, etc...). Cheaters may have a change in sex life (i.e.
more sex, less sex) as well as unexplained sexual requests.+
PHYSICAL CLUES: Does your spouse have to
"work late" more often? Do they go out with their friends more often?
Are their finances being dipped into more than usual? Do they act suspicious or
get defensive with simple questions?
The workplace is most of a common place where affairs start. Women tend to start
long-term relationships (with bosses, co-workers, mystery lovers etc.), and is
likely someone close to her. Physical signs to look for to determine whether or
not someone is having an affair is lipstick on the collar, odors of
cologne/perfume on a shirt/blouse, checking underwear for secretion stains. You
can also check their wallets and/or the glove compartments of their car to see
if they left receipts, pieces of paper with phone numbers, addresses, condoms,
etc. Another sign is "Finances". "If someone wants to play they
have to pay" therefore keeping an eye on their monies (i.e. check stubs,
bank account balances, credit card bills, etc...) would tell you whether their
spending more money than usual.
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INTUITION: Do you believe in your heart or gut
that your spouse is cheating? This is the MOST important question! Most
people who truly believe there is something wrong, are usually right. Only YOU
know the small intimate details of your relationship, thus, it is easier for you
to know than anyone else. Your intuition is your most powerful radar, trust it!
If you answered YES to one or more of these question there is a chance that your
spouse is cheating. Please hire a private investigator or place spy software on
your computer, since cyber affairs and online communication are the most common
ways cheaters interact. Don't make assumptions, get the facts first.
Written by Luigi Di Serio
http://www.diserio.com
for Catch-Cheaters.com
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